Fighting to Flourish – the American Dream

In Tucson, Arizona, visiting family

Why I Moved to Waco? That’s the question, right? We have been living here two years, nine months. We moved here for a job, but why would we take a job in Waco, Texas from San Diego, California? For the answer to a dream. We wanted a house, less stress, less debt, a better place to be a family. Follow God’s path for us.

Over the past couple years, I’ve received numerous emails and Instagram DM’s from people who live all over the country but mostly in California who tell me they identify with this desire to find a better land.

A better land – it’s a heart’s desire that can be found back in the pages of history.  The Israelites, God’s chosen people, picked up and moved with everything they could carry to exit the land of Egypt where there was food, water, and shelter.  They had the basic necessities, but they were slaves living a life of bondage.

There are many forms of bondage.  We can be slaves to work, our fears, another person, to the “man” i.e. debt, the expectations placed upon us by society, our parents, our environment. The American Dream says we have the right to be successful and achieve status if we work hard enough.  We tell our kids to stay in school, study hard, volunteer, stand out and get into the “right” school, so you can reach whatever pinnacle you DREAM.  What we don’t usually tell them is what that pursuit can cost.  Without a pure motivation, that pursuit can be for all the wrong reasons.  The adage “at all costs” goes hand in hand with “money doesn’t buy happiness.”

“Whoever trusts in his riches will fall, but the righteous will
flourish like a green leaf.” {Proverbs 11:28}

So if life’s big purpose doesn’t lie in having the biggest house, or the best college education, then how do we realign our dreams to find happiness, fulfillment, and contentment?

What are your dreams?

Are you a stay-at-home mom looking to be back in the workforce but wondering how you’ll ever give up what your life looks like now?  Are you afraid of that might look like?

Are you working a job that makes great money and pours into others but leaves you feeling dried up? Maybe you’re looking to step back from your career a bit and lean into raising your family.

Maybe your reality is drowning under a mountain of dirty diapers, laundry, and dishes, and all you need is a little time to get out from under all the monotonous responsibilities and be able to appreciate the sunshine and outdoors.

The truth is that we women have to face this struggle of finding our place, and sadly it usually means toting a bag of guilt under a hat of shame.  Fulfillment doesn’t come from a paycheck or what car you drive or how many kids you’re raising or how clean your house is.

Recently, my fourteen year old son and I were discussing school and being motivated for a future; he asked me, “What did you want to be, Mom? Did you want to be a mom and stay home and do laundry?”  It’s a good question.  The answer is yes.  I chose this for this season of my DREAM.  My mom did the same thing.  Of course there are trade-offs, and there are different paths I could have or still might pursue.  THAT is the American Dream.  Most importantly to me (and what I told him) is that I get to choose.  And yes, we discussed that it’s not just laundry and dishes.  He knows, but he’s a teenager.

The age-old proverb “All that glitters is not gold” holds true in every century.  We can’t just go for the shiniest option.  We need to go for what we’re called to be in the middle of – whether that’s running a corporation or running a household.

Find your joy today.  Step out in faith if it’s somewhere you’re scared to go.

Why Waco?

I wrote a post for the Waco Moms Blog as a reflection of the question we have heard the most in our transition here.

Feel free to read it here.

Year Two in Waco

 

As of today, we have lived in Waco two years!  It hardly seems possible.  I don’t know that I officially pass as a Texan, but there are many ways we have adapted to our new home state.  We still miss water and mountains and have found a snake and other nasty critters in our backyard (all harmless), but we have also hit some big mile markers.

Settling into our new home

Obviously, we love our home!  We’ve been living in it for fourteen months and though we don’t have every wall decorated perfectly and still have an original master bath (I’ve torn down the wallpaper at least), we can honestly say we feel settled in.  There are maybe a few boxes hidden in closets, but they are the things I have excuses not to deal with.  I’ve managed to keep about 2.5 indoor plants living, and we only lost a few of our front yard trees/bushes (I’m blaming the winter freeze).

Getting a Dog

She has been a part of our family for a few months now.  It’s been an adjustment.  I am still not a dog person, but I see how much the kids love her.  One more mommy sacrifice.  Her hair and strange herding behaviors with random people and my husband still make me sooo frustrated though.  Just like raising kids, we go through seasons.  The good news is each season is a little less difficult than the last – whining and barking are down.  But dog breath – wow, that’s a tough one to take.

Completing Junior High and Grammar School

Our kids are now twelve and fourteen and entering seventh and ninth grade.  It’s baffling.  These two years have been huge milestones, and I know that the upcoming six years will be filled with so many more, I will hardly have time to take them all in.  We entered the world of dances, cell phones, and shaving.  Next up: make-up, driving, and dating. Yikes.

More Involvement in the Community

We have friends and a life group and ties to many locals through school, work, even Instagram.  As most parents, we’re chameleons to the needs and involvements of our kids – each sport or activity becomes our current world.  My husband got back into the triathlon world this year.  The race ended up in a near tornado storm cancellation in the middle of the race!

Infinite amounts of Yardwork

No, really.  Winter is a nice break from the Texas heat, but then there are the INSANE amount of leaves.  We have 50+ trees in our backyard and 90% of them lose their leaves.  Yes, we are doing our own yard work (mostly my husband), and as he has slowly been shaping, cleaning, and redesigning the backyard as time and money allow, the people at the dump think he MUST own a landscape business!

More Travel

We promised ourselves that the move to a new part of the country would lead us to travel to new places.  While we haven’t reached international status yet, we did finally make it to the East Coast!  We spent two weeks this summer driving 3,700 miles through 15 states and saw big bucket list places like New York City, Washington DC, and the Atlantic Coast at Virginia Beach.  As silly as it might seem, I think the drive across the Chesapeake Bay Bridge and Tunnel was one of the most memorable.  We made it just before sunset and that sixteen miles of driving across the water (and under it) was just magical.  I only wish I had been able to capture a decent photo of the bridge.  We took plenty of others:

Brooklyn Bridge

Virginia Beach

Lincoln Memorial

Shehawken Lake in PA

Hopes for Year Three

Year Three has begun, and I can’t wait to see what amazing surprises God has in store for us.  One day at a time, with the promise that He will be with us and guide us according to His will.  I’m praying for more writing opportunities, more community involvement, and maybe another (dry) triathlon for the hubby!  I’m also so thankful for all the new people I’ve met through this venue.  It also makes me laugh when I have encounters like the one I recently had with a woman in Marshalls.  We had met once at a local restaurant months before as connected by our kids being at the same school.  We talked briefly at Marshalls, and she admitted she didn’t remember my name.  A few moments later, she said, “this might be weird, but are you ‘whyimovedtowaco’ on Instagram?  Isn’t this a weird world we live in now?”  It’s fun to hear so many stories of others who are seeking God’s will about where to live or their experiences while here in Waco.

Where Else to Find Me

I have been posting less on this blog because I have been contributing on the Waco Moms Blog for the past 6 months!  You can find more of my posts there or my random photo and thought posts on my Instagram account.

Blessings to y’all.

“Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will be carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6

When Time Flies in Texas

We moved into our house 1 year ago already!  Isn’t it funny how quickly the waiting period for something greatly anticipated suddenly becomes ordinary and almost a hazy memory?  We left the Southern California coast in all it’s perfect scenery and weather and a picture pretty life in exchange for something different.

We’re settling into our new phase of life; year two is almost down and I can officially say that it feels like time has flown.

I have some specific ways I can verify that we feel like we aren’t the new kids in town.

I’ve started talking about life here in years instead of months.

The one year anniversary of moving into the home I felt would never happen a year ago passed almost without notice.

I drive around the town without using a map app or even thinking much about how to get there; instead, I wonder if I should take one of three ways I know I could get there.

We get connected to other newbies in town who want to know how well we’ve adjusted.

When I talk to my husband, we’re both able to use names of the people in our community without descriptors like a last name or “the guy who works in marketing.”

I feel like I say the “the” before I refer to a freeway number less and less.

I say y’all without even realizing (not much but sometimes).

I sort of know where the small towns are that others mention they’re from.

We are less surprised by the randomness of Texas weather where it can rain at any moment!

Our kids now think athletic brand clothing is way cooler than surf brands and can run three miles in 80 plus degrees and 85% humidity.

We still miss the coast many days, especially as we are entering those hot mid-summer days where the heat index is 100+.  We have to constantly remind each other that what we said goodbye to there was hard, but what God is daily teaching us is new and unexpected.  No place is perfect.  We survive each day He has given us with enormous servings of grace.

Each new season of life is filled with adjustment.  We have a son entering high school and our daughter is officially in junior high.  We are in THAT stage.  We could be empty nesters in six years.  These are the days to hold on to.  I’m thankful for our health, a home, kids who still like us most days, and a faith-filled hope that we have purpose here on earth.

As we celebrate our nation’s independence, I also celebrate our independence as a family who sees the head of our house more often, who own a piece of the American dream, and can “afford” (I say that loosely as the truth is what Americans ever feel they can afford it all) everything we NEED.

Enjoy this holiday and thank God for the freedoms you have and the ability to appreciate all the little things one day at a time whether you’re limping or dancing.  In a blink of an eye, you’re suddenly in a new place, age, or phase of life.

“I have spoken to you with great frankness; I take great pride in you.  I am greatly encouraged; in all our troubles my joy knows no bounds.”  II Corinthians 7:4

Wood Floors, Marble, and Shiplap, Oh My!

Pendant lights – Sea Gull Lighting Heirloom Bronze from Build.com

The lights and cameras are gone; the Magnolia trucks have pulled away, and we live here!  It was so much fun reliving the fun experience of filming the show and filling in the blanks of what our house looked like from Demo Day to Reveal Day.  Honestly, it was not the easiest process for us beyond just the fact that we are introverts exposing ourselves on a television show.  The whole process of spending money for a “dream house” makeover is very foreign.

Quick clarification after the sudden surge of readers to my blog – I am not writing any of  this for money.  No one is paying me to write, maybe someday, but for now I am writing because I love to write, and I feel like it’s God-inspired.  I’m convinced writers never write for glory but because “writers write.”  It’s like those people who run or paint or draw or letter or handstand or dance.  You can’t stop the passion.  (You can try to hide from it though.)

Speaking of hiding, sometimes I hide from making big decisions.  Growing up, my sisters and parents would say I was the bossy oldest child, but I also grew into more of a “stay under the radar” kid most of the time.  I would agree to things based on the ease of moving on with life.  When we got married, I was agreeable to just about anything that streamlined the process and lightened my parents’ costs.  Fast forward twenty-two years, and my husband is so sweet to almost always say “yes” to me (even when I beg him not to if it’s not a good idea.)  I’m not at all implying I’m easy to get along with or merely a follower.  I just happen to be content with letting whoever has the loudest preference be happy.  Obviously, I speak out plenty at home – and none of this applies to my mothering!

As I’ve indicated before, our early married life was a financial struggle (isn’t everyday for most of us?), and we have learned to live such budgeted, careful lives that I actually have a really hard time spending money and choosing new, high ticket items (Target is a vortex however).  We’ve bought one new vehicle in our 22 years, and I regretted that decision after about six months.  We’ve never owned brand new appliances (except for a microwave).  We had one rental house that had new appliances and it was kind of intimidating.  We’ve owned three homes and none were new builds.  We did DIY updates to the first two, and they were always filled with the most cost efficient options.

So the idea of choosing all the finishes for a home renovation was daunting.  Thankfully, Joanna and her team made the process much easier.

Thank you for all the kind words in your responses here on the blog and on Instagram.   I love our house and couldn’t wait to fill the house with our belongings and really make it “home.”

Countertops – Carrera marble / Custom hood – Minwax stain: Special Walnut and Classic Grey / Hardware and faucets – Build.com / Cabinet paint – Sherwin Williams Alabaster / Sink – Kohler from Ferguson’s

 

Floors – Vinyl plank Van Gogh Hessian Oak by Karndean / Shiplap and fireplace paint – Sherwin Williams Alabaster / Custom shelves and mantel – Minwax stain: Special Walnut and Classic Grey

Front doors – Golden Oak & Classic Grey / Door handles – Build.com / Exterior Lights – Shades of Light / Siding color – Sherwin Williams Natural Tan / Trim paint – Sherwin Williams Pavestone

 

Ezekiel 34:26 “I will make them and the places surrounding my hill a blessing.  I will send down showers in season; there will be showers of blessing.”

 

When We Moved To Waco, We Never

 

May 2015 – before we knew we would move to Waco just 3 short months later!

We never planned to move to Waco.  It just came about.  When people here ask us “what brought you to Waco?” I think they expect to hear the common answer of “Baylor” or “we grew up here.”  But we say, “God.”  Because the truth is that it didn’t completely make sense to uproot our family from where we had friends, a job, and a place with a ocean view.

When we say we moved here from San Diego, the usual response is “Oh, it’s so pretty there!” or “I love the ocean” or “Why?”.  When we said we were moving to Waco, I know many of our friends, family, acquaintances, and others have said, “You should be on Fixer Upper!” (after some of them said the expected references to the Davidians or the bikers).  I’d guess that 50% of American households have heard of Chip and Joanna by now.  And we know that they are amazing, but they are NOT Waco.  I know people are moving here by the droves.  Literally.  The housing market is booming – the word is that it’s up 25% in just the past year.  Downtown businesses are growing, there will soon be an expanded riverwalk filled with restaurants and new businesses.  There are good things happening in Wacotown.  Magnolia and what Fixer Upper shows America is one of them.

It is fun to watch Waco scenery flash across the tv and see familiar faces we’ve met in our brief year and a half of living here.  What’s really strange about the whole Fixer Upper thing is that we will be seeing our own faces on there, on the next episode, which airs…TONIGHT!

So when I say “when we moved to Waco, we never…,” I really mean that we never thought we’d actually be ON Fixer Upper.  It all just happened.

We have had to be pretty hush-hush about the process (contractual agreements and all), but now that it is about to air…

Our family is so thankful for our home and everything Chip and Joanna have done to make that happen!

So, if you’re a Fixer Upper junkie or you just really want to see us makes fools of ourselves on national television, tune in tonight.

 

What’s for Dinner?

Where’s my Trader Joe’s when I need it?

Moving to Texas has not improved my cooking skills.  Neither has a new kitchen.  I guess that means I’m officially a hopeless case.  I pin all the recipes and have really good intentions, but I fall short in execution.  So I can confidently state that this blog will probably never have recipes to share unless they are something delicious someone else made.

My biggest excuse since becoming a mom has been that I have picky eaters.  I hate making meals that require extra planning for the one who won’t eat.  And yes, we have been very strict about his eating in the early years.  But when your kid is small for his age and has the stubbornness of a donkey…you start negotiating.  Then you’re boxed into a corner where every meal is a battle.  We are making giant strides – he actually likes steak and ribs now – maybe it’s a Texas-thing, but he doesn’t like hamburgers, barely eats fries, won’t touch salad, and is pretty sure we enjoy torturing him.  Which is true, of course.

Growing up, I felt the same way about my mom’s cooking.  Why did she have to make meatloaf or rice casserole?  Like all kids, we asked “what’s for dinner?”  I wonder if she braced for the moaning like I do now.

He seriously ordered this!

One of the few healthy things I make that 3 out of the 4 of us like!

Breakfast for dinner at least once a week is ok, right?

 

About two years ago, I got smart.  I wrote a menu for the week on a cutesy chalkboard.  Then it was there for all to see what torture awaited.  It wasn’t listed in order – I’m not that organized – so there was room for some negotiation if someone really wanted a particular meal on a certain day.  And if there was a meal they were dreading, at least they could get the moaning done all at once.

My old menu chalkboard – not even sure where it is now…

But somehow I’ve fallen off that train.  Maybe it’s because my chalkboard was packed in a box for almost a year.  I have a new larger chalkboard in the new house, but I’m waiting for meal planning inspiration.  I’ve been invited to the meal planning parties, but I just can’t.  I know it will go to waste and cost me more than I can tolerate.  My family is not great at eating leftovers either.  I’m working on being better at “re-inventing” the leftovers into something different.

The truth is I know the answer: a personal chef.  Right?  My husband basically is one (more on that in a future post), but he can’t really do it all, can he?  I’d have too much guilt.  Which I already have because I make the same boring meals every week.  The staples are rotisserie chicken tacos, spaghetti, pizza, BLT’s (or grilled cheese for the picky), and definitely breakfast.

Now that it’s starting to feel like fall (this week it’s been around forty degrees for a high!), I might find inspiration to add variety to my meals.  Biggest problem there is my kids think Ramen is better than anything homemade.  So, why bother when half of it will go to waste?  Feel free to give me advice, encouragement, or the “make them eat it.”  I’ve heard a rumor that kids need to try something at least 3 times before they truly can decide if they like it and that their tastebuds change every seven years.  Don’t know if that’s true, but I feel like I’m suiting up for battle with every “just try it” or “you’re gonna eat it anyway.”

Last night we had chili – I got the recipe from a friend when we ate it at their house awhile back.  There was definitely complaining!  I even added Fritos to help the allure for the kids. Tonight, we are eating with friends – she’s making extra mac ‘n cheese.  What are you making for dinner tonight? (I’ll need the inspiration for tomorrow!)

Glittery Life

All that is gold does not glitter; not all those who wander are lost; the old that is strong does not wither; deep roots are not reached by the frost.

J. R. R. Tolkien

Skull Creek in Hilton Head Island, SC – my first visit to the Atlantic Coast!

I’m sliding this post in under the November wire.  I can’t believe it’s Christmas season again.  As I shared last year, this time of year brings out some stressed tendencies.  I’m leaning into my mantra – Grace Over Frustration.  As for my excuse for not blogging, I could say something cheesy like “I’ve been soul searching” or “I’m just so busy,” but the truth is that I guess I’ve been wandering in my own head and just not able (willing?) to write it down.  Lots of amazing things have happened since our move to Waco.  Lots of hard things too.  That life, right?  Stealing from Tolkien’s metaphors, I guess the question is that despite wanderings, aging, and seasons of frost, can I still see what is golden?

Since my last post, and despite the intense sports and homework schedule our kids have been facing, my husband and I got the chance to sneak away for my first visit to the Atlantic Coast.  It was beautiful and relaxing.

Then there is Real Life re-entry which leads to self-questioning of Why Am I Doing This? at every obstacle.  It might be what I said (or texted) to a friend or when we’re knee-deep in middle school homework and study land.  I most definitely ask “why am I doing this?” after every blog post.  Within the first hours, I want to go back and delete it.  It makes me sick to my stomach.  Call it the perfectionist in me.  Blame it on insecurity.  I really am an introvert.  Honest.  I’ve taken the personality tests to prove it.  Is anyone obsessed with personality tests?  I took the Meyers-Briggs assessment about fifteen years ago as a part of being an RA in college.  I was an INFJ – “The Advocate personality type is very rare, making up less than one percent of the population, but they nonetheless leave their mark on the world. As members of the Diplomat Role group, Advocates have an inborn sense of idealism and morality, but what sets them apart is that they are not idle dreamers, but people capable of taking concrete steps to realize their goals and make a lasting positive impact.”  Hmmm, I definitely identify with my idealistic propensity, but my concrete steps feel more like lead boots lately.

Last month, I decided to retake the test (16personalities.com), and apparently, I have morphed into an INFP, a Mediator.  Under Mediator Careers, I found this nugget: “First and foremost is seemingly every Mediators’ dream growing up – to become an author.”  So apparently, I haven’t grown up.  Or this is the midlife crisis in full affect.

In the search for gold, I allow fear to magnify the weightiness of words when I’ve reached my tipping point.  Just look at social media these days and wonder about politics, religion, or just basic human interactions.  It’s something we should all want to laugh and cry over.  We all want to be advocates for what is “right” or stand up against what’s “wrong.” The real problem here is we don’t all have the same compass.  So we can literally expect to go in metaphoric circles.

The true nuggets of gold usually don’t glitter as Tolkien so beautifully laid out.  We all speak out because most of us are just trying to make sense of this world.  We search for true beauty in the depths of human experience – through pain, trials, and wanderings.  We hope for our treasure in the rubble.

Another part of the Mediator personality definition was that “there will always be a need, and now more than ever, to win people’s hearts and minds with the written word.”  Is that a plug for Ultimate Truth or what?  As an Advocate now Mediator, I have to look at myself as a mouthpiece.  We are all mouthpieces.  What we say, do, and post reflect on us – as a person and as a human being. The harder life gets, the deeper I want my roots to hold me fast.  See what I mean about mid-life crisis talk?

This season of my life reigns in parenting a pre-teen and teenager.  We are at that point of knowing we still mostly have the power to set rules and boundaries and dole out praise and discipline to help guide our kids to be successful human beings.   Obviously, that word “successful” means different things to different people.  I hope our kids will find strength in the Truth and that they will be deeply rooted in love (Ephesians 3), and that we are sufficient MEDIATORS for their journey into adulthood.

Final question: what’s your personality type and do you agree with it’s LABEL of you?

Anyone else have a love/hate relationship with those hotel mirrors that show you the real you?  And seriously, I need a new phone cover!

The Tipping Point

I have a love-hate relationship with roller coasters.  As a child, I felt I had to go on them.  I was the oldest of four girls, and my dad needed a companion in the thrill.  I have a pretty legitimate fear of heights.  Even today, when I drive on single lane bridge overpasses, it makes me queasy.  I mentally overcome my fears by telling myself “I have to do this” or “it’s not that bad.”  Now, my own kids beg me to go on roller coasters.  When we had passes to Legoland, they had to have an adult to go on the rides (yes, I realize these don’t even count as roller coasters).  I would visualize before we were even on the ride that moment at the peak of the drop, where I knew I would momentarily wish I was dead.  But I had to do it.  My kids needed me to.  Just like my dad needed me to.

I am a people pleaser.  I’ve started to grow out of it though.  I tell my husband that he has helped me stand in my own place and say “no, I don’t have to if I don’t want to today.”

Today, I’m not wanting to.  I’m at a tipping point.  I’ve arrived at the peak of where we’re at in our new home.  I’m surveying the landscape and taking inventory of what this ride holds for us.  This tipping point is also the reality checkpoint.  All the newness has begun to wear off.  Our landscape isn’t filled with so many exciting unknowns.  It’s filled with dips and climbs in the form of house project checklists, homework-filled weeknights, and schedules filled with “have-to’s.”  We have a new life rhythm of school, work, church, and whatever we fill in the in-between.  We have new go-to’s that have new people and places.  All the dreams we imagined for our new life are a little more watered down with truth that budgets, schoolwork, and yardwork bring.  We are leaning into the turns where God is bringing us as a family into deeper spiritual and social growth.  Others are still the ones traveling the world, buying boats, and getting puppies.  Instead, we are filling our lungs with Texas air at the football stadium and cross country meet wildflowers.  Our rain-dirtied car is loaded with schoolbooks and smelly shoes and an exercise mat.  I am still working on that book that should be finished by now.

Does it sound like I’m feeling sorry for myself?  It’s that daily teetering precipice.  Each day, I choose which way I let the scale tip.  Joy or Discouragement.  Fear or Courage.  Contentment or Bitterness.

We all move through life the same way.  One foot in front of the other.  We choose our path.  My prayer this week has been that I could truly let “God determine my steps” (Proverbs 16:9).  When I’m at my tipping point, I need Him to nudge me the right direction, towards His best.  When others fail me, or I fail myself, He can make it right.  I’m trying to be a living example of this for our kids.  This is the point of the school year where everyone feels the squeeze.  Homework and studying are almost all-consuming.  My kids are such troopers.  Somedays, I want to take away the struggle and give up for them.  We’ve hit that point where I’m ready to pull the ripcord and say “this is too much.”  We’ve done this to them – plucked them out of the only place they really remember and put them in a new city, new school, and new way of life.  And it is hard.  Hours of studying doesn’t always produce success.  Being nice to people doesn’t always mean they’ll include you.  Practice doesn’t always make perfect in this life.

But in Christ, our joy will be made complete.  Joy doesn’t mean perfect circumstances.  It’s being thankful that we have each other.  We have everything we need.  I choose to bathe in the truth that “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)  Failure has value.  It can make us better.  It can lead us down a path where God can use us where we might not have gone if we hadn’t met our limit.  We can’t let the shiny things of this world steal our joy.  I want to reflect this to my children, so they won’t get caught sliding into the traps of disappointment, discontent, and disillusionment.

I want to reflect this to myself.  “In Christ alone, my cornerstone, weak made strong in the Savior’s love.   Through the storm, He is Lord, Lord of all.”

 

 

Getting Into a Rhythm

As we start lap 2 of living in Waco, we are having to find new ways to lean into making this our HOME. We’re barely getting adjusted to our new home.  I’d say there are still about 15 boxes to be unpacked – some because the bonus rooms aren’t ready for games and more books (yes, we have SO MANY books – I should count someday) and some just because I’m not “feeling” where the stuff inside said box should go.  Some would say I should just get rid of what I can’t find a place for in a 3000+ square foot house, but I’m not ready for that yet.  Slow and steady wins the race?

My philosophy of moving into a home (which we have done literally 20ish times in our 21 year marriage) is to grow into the space.  Sometimes I lay out all my options for a room and leave it looking cluttered until I pare down to what I decide to keep there.  And sometimes, I leave it pretty sparse until I find inspiration for a wall or shelf. We’ve rearranged the furniture in the living room and our bedroom twice, the office 3 times, and the walls are mostly still bare as I keep changing the location of what I’ve leaned against them.  Yesterday, while the kids were at their first day back at school, I attacked the laundry room to find some better order for the backpacks and laundry that somehow have to coexist.

Back to school was all about trying to figure out where to shop for the shoes they’d both outgrown.  We made the rookie mistake of not just buying what we saw the first time the month before, and so we spent some wasted hours trying to find the right size and uniform code appropriate color, only to end up buying two pairs instead of just one.  Female shoe shopping is no joke – don’t let anyone tell you any different.  My husband knows better.  I buy no more than 2 pairs a year because of my indecisive/budget conscious  inner struggle.  So he’ll buy me a pair (that I take back half the time) or my sister finally bought me a pair of Converse that I wasn’t sure I could pull off.

The previous seven years of schooling, we’d usually spend the last night of summer at the beach.  There isn’t really a beach here, although I guess we could’ve gone to the park at the lake?  We did start a new tradition thanks to a friend’s suggestion.  We sat together as a family and prayed over each of the kids and for the school year.  It was sweet to hear their prayers for each other.  Next year, I’m hoping we’ll have a pool to celebrate the last night of summer with a splash.

Now that we’re back on track (can you tell that we’re back into cross country training?), it feels appropriate to evaluate what will become our “rhythm” here.  How will we choose to spend our time and money and what is God telling us to do with both of these?  As September approaches, it’s a more realistic “spring cleaning” for me as I reset our schedules and our budget.  It’s time to see just what God has in store for us as we stop just treading water and start paddling towards new goals – whether they are spiritual, academic, financial, or fitness focused.

 

Another friend renewed by own resolve about pursuing passion and excellence as she posted about her desire to keep art going in her everyday life.  “Life often gets in the way, which in turn, starts to define art as a distraction…I want art and life merged into one organic and messy flow.”  She went on to say she was challenging herself to spend one hour an evening on her painting.  She already discovered that she DID have the time for her passion.

And that’s where I picked back up the truth that I had set aside (probably packed in a box) – I am the only one in control of how I spend my time.  I can’t blame it on my kids or my husband.  It is only me.  My motivation to pursue what God has put within me lies in my choices with my time, my words, my action.  The woman who teaches the class at the gym that I go to often encourages (sometimes guilts) me with her challenge to “just tell yourself you’ll do for just ten minutes.”  Then you usually end up going for it.

“What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and no human mind has conceived” – the things God has prepared for those who love him – these are the things God has revealed to us by his Spirit.” I Corinthians 2:9-10a